What’s the matter with kids today? La,la,la . . ..
We can say that they are rude, entitled, or just plain asses, but it occurs to me that modern-day kids lack one thing that makes all the difference in the world; humility. Children today don’t seem to accept the chain of command, and they have no respect for the wisdom of adults who have lived long enough to earn the right to lead them and guide them as supportive adults should do . . .
If children had a sense of humility, they would experience gratitude for their amazing, Technicolor lives, and all of the privileges that they have been granted. Notice I say privileges, and not rights. Kids get what they want today, and wear what their friends do, and expect every whim to be provided for as instantly as an ATM provides cash. As adults, we do our children an injustice by allowing them to continue to exert their demands and to continue to enable them to believe that this is how the world really works. We are not preparing our children for the real world at all, the one that we live in, and we are not providing them with the knowledge they need to one day sign our social security checks.
During a recent conversation with my daughter, a twenty-five year old who is living with her boyfriend, we discussed the possibility of her having children one day. To my surprise, she raised some valid points against having children that I have never heard spoken before. I had previously thought that I had heard all the usual arguments; costs, a messed-up world, etc. My daughter pointed out that kids today are, in general, assholes who suck the life out of you. How could I argue? I mean, I love my children, and have never regretted having them, but every word she said was true. With the rare exception, kids ask, and take, and disregard, and ask and take again.
Even the rare parents, who take the time and effort to teach virtues to their children, have to at some point allow their children to go out into the world, and onto the Internet, where they are barraged by images and messages that do everything possible to undo what has been taught at home. Schools do nothing to counteract this effect. Schools coddle students as well, refusing to fail them, passing them through, and cow-towing to parents. No Child Left Behind is a joke. We are teaching students how to pass a test, and have thrown real education out the window entirely. Education is worse than ever, and no politician is going to change this fact.
Both of my children are well on their way to becoming adults, and I am proud to say that they are so far, equipped to deal with the stresses of the real-world. But, it has been a long haul, with a great deal of angst, and worry, and giving, giving, giving. For me, it’s been worth it, but I had my kids when I was so young that I never stopped to think about what I was doing. For my daughter to realize all that she has, at twenty-five, and to realize that she might just be too selfish to have children, is just plain brilliant. She has really thought about this, and she has valid reservations against ever having children. Although I would like to be a Granny one day, I would never have my daughter give up a moment of her happiness to grant me that title.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Pursuit of Happiness
March 29, 2011
Pogo Score: 3,199,066
I’m trying to choke down some oatmeal--it’s really too dry and I think I’m finished. My body is rejecting the glutinous mass. This is what happens when I try to eat something healthy. An adverse reaction kicks in, and my body reacts badly. If I had ice-cream instead, that would slide right down the gullet with no interference whatsoever.
Right now, it seems that the people who are close to me are all battling some kind of misfortune and sadness. It’s so important to be there for people you love, when they need a kind and willing ear. It’s important to let them know you are there, and that you are listening, even though there is nothing that you can do to solve their problems, or to decrease their suffering.
People suffer. It’s part of life, and yet, we continue to be disappointed when things don’t go our way, or when life is not “fair,” and our luck is in the toilet. We “expect” to be happy, as if this is our right. With all due respect to the Declaration of Independence, we have the right to pursue life, liberty and happiness, but we don’t have the right to possess them. If pursuit was a good as possession we would all be the children of top celebrities. We would all be rich. We would all be happy.
So why can’t we become more tolerant towards suffering? Why can’t we learn to expect to suffer, and to feel pain? For me, my pain sometimes transcends into a thing that is beautiful, when it inspires me to create something beautiful that comes from the pain. Creativity does not come from comfort, or excess. Creativity comes from feeling all the scrapes and bruises the body can bear, and the mind can accept. Good things come from bad things, everyday.
Pogo Score: 3,199,066
I’m trying to choke down some oatmeal--it’s really too dry and I think I’m finished. My body is rejecting the glutinous mass. This is what happens when I try to eat something healthy. An adverse reaction kicks in, and my body reacts badly. If I had ice-cream instead, that would slide right down the gullet with no interference whatsoever.
Right now, it seems that the people who are close to me are all battling some kind of misfortune and sadness. It’s so important to be there for people you love, when they need a kind and willing ear. It’s important to let them know you are there, and that you are listening, even though there is nothing that you can do to solve their problems, or to decrease their suffering.
People suffer. It’s part of life, and yet, we continue to be disappointed when things don’t go our way, or when life is not “fair,” and our luck is in the toilet. We “expect” to be happy, as if this is our right. With all due respect to the Declaration of Independence, we have the right to pursue life, liberty and happiness, but we don’t have the right to possess them. If pursuit was a good as possession we would all be the children of top celebrities. We would all be rich. We would all be happy.
So why can’t we become more tolerant towards suffering? Why can’t we learn to expect to suffer, and to feel pain? For me, my pain sometimes transcends into a thing that is beautiful, when it inspires me to create something beautiful that comes from the pain. Creativity does not come from comfort, or excess. Creativity comes from feeling all the scrapes and bruises the body can bear, and the mind can accept. Good things come from bad things, everyday.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Virtually Living
As I write this, I have just left off in the middle of my fourth game of war mahjong. I felt uncomfortable playing, because I know that I was only playing out of avoidance. I have been avoiding taking a shower, eating something healthy, playing with my dogs, and facing the bleakest of life situations; long-term unemployment, depression, and an overall feeling of hopelessness. Plenty of reasons to lose myself in war mahjong, except today, I can’t do this with any level of comfort, and so I begin this writing.
I’m sure that I am not alone. When I log onto Facebook, or Pogo games, or e-mail, it seems that almost everyone I know is online, or has been online, leaving their digital footprints for everyone to follow. I’m not the only one trying to lose myself for short or long periods of time. We are all in the same boat. Avoiding something, and staying online for a little bit longer in order to continue doing so.
It occurs to me that this virtual existence has become a problem, and too easy an avenue of escape. Nothing gets done, the days roll by, and as my game points accrue, my real life slowly continues to unravel. This has become a barely tolerable existence, as opposed to real-life, which right now seems entirely too intolerable to bear. Now, my days are muted, and blurred by consecutive games of crossword and mahjong, occasionally interrupted by checking e-mail, or the news on Yahoo. I’m lucky if I even know what day it is, or what month, or even what year. It doesn’t seem to matter anymore. I have over three-million points on Pogo. Progress is being made. I may stink, but nobody cares online. I may be unemployed, but I earn the same points as everyone else. My house may be messy, and my laundry piling up, but again, it’s far too easy to pretend otherwise, because everyone wears blinders in the virtual world.
Of course, I do learn something in my virtual world. I keep by brain sharp with puzzles, so that if the real world ever needs me again, I’ll be ready to step up, get up and go. This morning, I learned that radiated water can burn your feet through your shoes, and that Lindsay Lohan is dropping her last name, and just going by “Lindsay,” and also that Abercrombie & Fitch have a hand in stealing the youth of American girls by offering pre-teens padded bikinis, shame on them . . . And this is just today. I learn important things like this everyday.
Any oddity that crosses my mind can be “Googled” instantly, like the number of eggs a sea-turtle hatches, and what exactly does a sea turtle look like? I Google my name to see what comes up, and I Google the names of my family and friends. That kills a good fifteen minutes to a half-hour. There is no limit to how many times I can kill fifteen minutes to a half-hour with Google.
There is a great deal of money being made online. Sometimes I look at websites that offer any item the mind can fathom, and I wonder if I am “missing the boat.” Should I be a web entrepreneur? And what would I sell? I have a bamboo garden in my backyard, growing wild. Could I sell stalks of bamboo for cold, hard cash? The problem is, that so many companies, and websites in the virtual world I hang out in, don’t tell the truth about anything. They lie all the time, and so they can’t ever be trusted. This is fine with me, as long as I know they are lying. Then, I begin to wonder how all that internet cash I'll be reeling in will affect my unemployment check. Uh-oh. The real world sometimes creeps into the virtual world, and my body tenses, my stomach churns, and that’s a good sign that Internet Entrepreneurship is not for me. Onto the next puzzle. Phew, that was close!
I’m sure that I am not alone. When I log onto Facebook, or Pogo games, or e-mail, it seems that almost everyone I know is online, or has been online, leaving their digital footprints for everyone to follow. I’m not the only one trying to lose myself for short or long periods of time. We are all in the same boat. Avoiding something, and staying online for a little bit longer in order to continue doing so.
It occurs to me that this virtual existence has become a problem, and too easy an avenue of escape. Nothing gets done, the days roll by, and as my game points accrue, my real life slowly continues to unravel. This has become a barely tolerable existence, as opposed to real-life, which right now seems entirely too intolerable to bear. Now, my days are muted, and blurred by consecutive games of crossword and mahjong, occasionally interrupted by checking e-mail, or the news on Yahoo. I’m lucky if I even know what day it is, or what month, or even what year. It doesn’t seem to matter anymore. I have over three-million points on Pogo. Progress is being made. I may stink, but nobody cares online. I may be unemployed, but I earn the same points as everyone else. My house may be messy, and my laundry piling up, but again, it’s far too easy to pretend otherwise, because everyone wears blinders in the virtual world.
Of course, I do learn something in my virtual world. I keep by brain sharp with puzzles, so that if the real world ever needs me again, I’ll be ready to step up, get up and go. This morning, I learned that radiated water can burn your feet through your shoes, and that Lindsay Lohan is dropping her last name, and just going by “Lindsay,” and also that Abercrombie & Fitch have a hand in stealing the youth of American girls by offering pre-teens padded bikinis, shame on them . . . And this is just today. I learn important things like this everyday.
Any oddity that crosses my mind can be “Googled” instantly, like the number of eggs a sea-turtle hatches, and what exactly does a sea turtle look like? I Google my name to see what comes up, and I Google the names of my family and friends. That kills a good fifteen minutes to a half-hour. There is no limit to how many times I can kill fifteen minutes to a half-hour with Google.
There is a great deal of money being made online. Sometimes I look at websites that offer any item the mind can fathom, and I wonder if I am “missing the boat.” Should I be a web entrepreneur? And what would I sell? I have a bamboo garden in my backyard, growing wild. Could I sell stalks of bamboo for cold, hard cash? The problem is, that so many companies, and websites in the virtual world I hang out in, don’t tell the truth about anything. They lie all the time, and so they can’t ever be trusted. This is fine with me, as long as I know they are lying. Then, I begin to wonder how all that internet cash I'll be reeling in will affect my unemployment check. Uh-oh. The real world sometimes creeps into the virtual world, and my body tenses, my stomach churns, and that’s a good sign that Internet Entrepreneurship is not for me. Onto the next puzzle. Phew, that was close!
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